“It’s like it envelops me and pulls me back down to earth. And then immediately elevates me to new happier places. Banishing the demons.” Continue reading
Author Archives: sammijo110
Fear and Loneliness
Fear Fear like love takes many forms. The fear of doing something new, the fear of losing someone, the fear of making a mistake – they are all different. There are imagined fears and real ones. Neither is any less severe or scary. This blog started as a way of testing my writing skills and … Continue reading
Grounded
As I reach 3-months off coming all medication, my body & mind are slowly starting to settle. There has however been a mix of emotions plaguing me as my mind learns to cope with the influx of pure, raw thoughts and feelings. One of those that I didn’t expect is homesickness. For the first time … Continue reading
A letter never meant to be delivered (PS. Please help me get out of prison)
There is a fellow blogger who’s whole blog is a catalogue of ‘letters never to be delivered’ – letters that you write to help YOU work things out, not for the recipient to ever read – and although it’s not the first time I’ve heard of the concept, this is the one of the first … Continue reading
Misdirection
I have an admiration and a fear of magic – the power of making someone feel, think & believe. Mirrored in the arts; artists, musicians and actors like magicians have the capability to direct, divert and deceive. Magic in particular often uses misdirection. Using it to make a mundane action, exciting, mystical, and magical. Over … Continue reading
Colours of my mind
I have never been able to sleep very well. From not being able to get to sleep to not sleeping through the night. Tonight is a bad night. I know that I should not think about it in that way as It will not help the situation, ‘Positive thinking’ It’s all about ‘Perception’ and all … Continue reading
*Trust*The*Process*
Every blog I write starts with a list of words. My inspiration for writing. My brainstorm. My pains. From that point I start to form sentences, creating threads to weave them together, ready to iron them into sense. Today I have been starring at the list for hours and instead of ‘weaving threads’, my head … Continue reading
Broken
Over the past few years I have been learning more and more about how our brains work believing that if I understood what was happening in my mind then I would be able to learn how to manage my mind better. More recently I have been learning about the chimp and the human, the old … Continue reading
Good, strong people : Reset Button
Following my wobble, I have been so lucky to experience the wisdom of some good, strong people who have managed to switch my reset button and set me back on track. How? I honestly don’t really know how exactly, but following laughter & silliness with an old friend, a random encounter with a couple in … Continue reading
The ‘kick’
Trying to describe depression is hard at the best of times, exasperated when you are actually feeling depressed. Depression suffocates you in a way that most people don’t think is possible. It drains you. What has been frustrating me is what triggers my depression. Understandably when something bad happens, it is upsetting and that’s normal. … Continue reading