Yellow is Dead

October 8, 2022

Switching Off

Sober for October At the end of September, I decided that I needed to do something different to feel better. After months of various illnesses and just feeling extremely run down, I have committed to ‘Sober for October’. The first day I wrote this: Day 1 What the actual f**k am I doing? I’m run […]

February 22, 2022

Adulthood

Welcome to Adulthood. I didn’t realise the gravity that not being able to drive truly held over me until I passed today. While I watched the majority of my friends pass at 17-18 years old; I failed – twice. I then went to uni and after moved to London and it was not a priority. […]

January 23, 2022

Sacrifices

23 days into 2022 and how am I doing? Not the best. After the first week, I started to rate myself against the P’s of my New Year Resolutions and I was massively kind to myself. Another week on and I started to feel the January Blues. All coinciding with “Blue Monday” – a day […]

December 30, 2021

Derailed – My Ps

I went into last year with the motto: ‘Pro-active’. And I chose ‘Pro-active’ specifically over positive as I felt that: 1) I’m never going to be a positive person. I’m a glass half empty person and I’m cynical and being negative is my way of protecting myself – that’s not a mind-set that you can […]

January 16, 2021

The Best Medicine

“It’s like it envelops me and pulls me back down to earth. And then immediately elevates me to new happier places. Banishing the demons.”

June 4, 2019

Fear and Loneliness

Fear Fear like love takes many forms. The fear of doing something new, the fear of losing someone, the fear of making a mistake – they are all different. There are imagined fears and real ones. Neither is any less severe or scary. This blog started as a way of testing my writing skills and […]

November 29, 2018

Grounded

As I reach 3-months off coming all medication, my body & mind are slowly starting to settle. There has however been a mix of emotions plaguing me as my mind learns to cope with the influx of pure, raw thoughts and feelings. One of those that I didn’t expect is homesickness. For the first time […]

August 26, 2018

A letter never meant to be delivered (PS. Please help me get out of prison)

There is a fellow blogger who’s whole blog is a catalogue of ‘letters never to be delivered’ – letters that you write to help YOU work things out, not for the recipient to ever read – and although it’s not the first time I’ve heard of the concept, this is the one of the first […]

May 7, 2017

Misdirection

I have an admiration and a fear of magic – the power of making someone feel, think & believe. Mirrored in the arts; artists, musicians and actors like magicians have the capability to direct, divert and deceive. Magic in particular often uses misdirection. Using it to make a mundane action, exciting, mystical, and magical. Over […]

January 9, 2017

Colours of my mind

I have never been able to sleep very well. From not being able to get to sleep to not sleeping through the night. Tonight is a bad night. I know that I should not think about it in that way as It will not help the situation, ‘Positive thinking’ It’s all about ‘Perception’ and all […]